Snowflakes and Choices

Doing another first today without my husband... going to a g-show with a friend... you would think going out would be an exciting fun thing… I like this person… and I enjoy his company… he is a good man…. I think this is just two friends going to an event together… it is hard though… g-shows were David’s thing…. Sad and confused… I went with him part of the time… but it was a thing for him to do with his buds…

So … I have a choice. I can celebrate that he enjoyed his life and enjoyed looking around at these shows… and choose to venture forth and enjoy the day… or I can allow myself to sink into desolation because he is no longer here to do so… he was a good man and we were blessed to share each other’s lives.

I know he would not want me to be in desolation… I know this about him… so… write your way through the sadness you are feeling this morning… have some coffee… take the ashes out… stop and appreciate the absolute beauty of the snow gently falling… without any wind… it is so beautiful outside right now… calm… peaceful… everything shrouded in a white cape … made up of tiny exquisite pieces of artwork… yes snowflakes…

I stepped out before the sun was up… it was 20 degrees F… but seems warmer… probably because the wind is not blowing… so there I am out looking around as I start to run the dogs out … and I see this sparkle … caught by the dim porch light… snowflakes… the birds in the evergreen tree in front of the door rustled their wings as I walked under their nightly perch… sending more flakes flitting across my gaze… so it is a choice… sadness and desolation… or stop… take a breath… and appreciate the beauty of this snowy morning… on the first day of Feb. 2014…

Frankly… I have really had enough of desolation… so… I am lifting my coffee cup in a salute… and giving thanks for the day… you know that feels a whole lot like inner peace… yes it does… savoring the sensation…

Mary E. Robbins
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Took these pics this morning...

when it snows or is foggy... it is as if this little hollow is it's own little world... hidden away in shrouds of gray or white...

can not see beyond the ridge...

this is the tree just in front of my door... the one I hear the birds in at night...

there is running water out under that evergreen tree for the birds...

you can sort of see the buff ducks just on the other side of the gate... sitting outside in the snow... yes they have a barn... they were talking amongst themselves... sounded happy...

Diesel's chew toy... yes it is a tire...

not moving... just clearing out stuff that is useable and cleaning out my quonset... for any of you that do not know the grey rounded building is a quonset

7 p.m.


Just came in from ranch rounds... bit chilly... 14 degrees F... the girls gave me an egg... no wind... really beautiful cold night with a sliver of a crescent moon...

My plans for today ended up changing... my friend decided to stay home because of the weather... which was probably a good idea... so ... I stayed home as well... folded some laundry... cleaned up some dirt... watched some tv... actually watched chicago pd and some of continuum...

working out is still on my list... emptied the ashes... mow mow tat's litter box... watered everyone outside... fed who needed feeding... threw out some trash... made a list for feb...

I lost 10.4 pounds in January... there have been some nifty changes in body composition... muscle gain... fat loss... my waist is down to 40 inches from 46 inches... met my clothing size goal too... actually a month ahead of time... I was aiming to get into a size 48 bib overalls... already in them... I looked in my closet today... and it dawned on me that 95% of the clothes in there will be moving on to other folks... not right now but throughout the year...

just had my dinner... cremated chicken... yeah I forgot to set the timer... was still edible... well it was still protein... lol.... oh yeah and had some green salad with olive oil and vinegar...

have the top oven set on clean now... gotta love a self cleaning oven... hmmmm... wonder how one would create a self cleaning house... now there is a thought...

all in all it has been a good day... it has also been a seriously beautiful day...