Monday, October 26, 2009

Forgiveness: How to let go of grudges and bitterness

This Post is reposted from the Mayo Clinic Site

When someone you care about hurts you, you can hold on to anger, resentment and thoughts of revenge or embrace forgiveness and move forward. By Mayo Clinic staff
Photo of Katherine M. Piderman, Ph.D.
Katherine M. Piderman, Ph.D.

Nearly everyone has been hurt by the actions or words of another. Your mother criticized your parenting skills. Your friend gossiped about you. Your partner had an affair. These wounds can leave you with lasting feelings of anger, bitterness and even vengeance.

But when you don't practice forgiveness, you may be the one who pays most dearly. By embracing forgiveness, you embrace peace, hope, gratitude and joy. Here, Katherine M. Piderman, Ph.D., staff chaplain at Mayo Clinic, Rochester, Minn., discusses forgiveness and how it can lead you down the path of physical, emotional and spiritual well-being.

What is forgiveness?

There's no one definition of forgiveness. But in general, forgiveness is a decision to let go of resentments and thoughts of revenge. Forgiveness is the act of untying yourself from thoughts and feelings that bind you to the offense committed against you. This can reduce the power these feelings otherwise have over you, so that you can a live freer and happier life in the present. Forgiveness can even lead to feelings of understanding, empathy and compassion for the one who hurt you.

Doesn't forgiving someone mean you're forgetting or condoning what happened?

Absolutely not! Forgiving isn't the same as forgetting what happened to you. The act that hurt or offended you may always remain a part of your life. But forgiveness can lessen its grip on you and help you focus on other, positive parts of your life. Forgiveness also doesn't mean that you deny the other person's responsibility for hurting you, and it doesn't minimize or justify the wrong. You can forgive the person without excusing the act.

What are the benefits of forgiving someone?

Researchers have recently become interested in studying the effects of being unforgiving and being forgiving. Evidence is mounting that holding on to grudges and bitterness results in long-term health problems. Forgiveness, on the other hand, offers numerous benefits, including:

  • Lower blood pressure
  • Stress reduction
  • Less hostility
  • Better anger management skills
  • Lower heart rate
  • Lower risk of alcohol or substance abuse
  • Fewer depression symptoms
  • Fewer anxiety symptoms
  • Reduction in chronic pain
  • More friendships
  • Healthier relationships
  • Greater religious or spiritual well-being
  • Improved psychological well-being

Why do we hold grudges and become resentful and unforgiving?

The people most likely to hurt us are those closest to us — our partners, friends, siblings and parents. When we're hurt by someone we love and trust — whether it's a lie, betrayal, rejection, abuse or insult — it can be extremely difficult to overcome. And even minor offenses can turn into huge conflicts.

When you experience hurt or harm from someone's actions or words, whether this is intended or not, you may begin experiencing negative feelings such as anger, confusion or sadness, especially when it's someone close to you. These feelings may start out small. But if you don't deal with them quickly, they can grow bigger and more powerful. They may even begin to crowd out positive feelings. Grudges filled with resentment, vengeance and hostility take root when you dwell on hurtful events or situations, replaying them in your mind many times.

Soon, you may find yourself swallowed up by your own bitterness or sense of injustice. You may feel trapped and may not see a way out. It's very hard to let go of grudges at this point and instead you may remain resentful and unforgiving.

How do I know it's time to try to embrace forgiveness?

When we hold on to pain, old grudges, bitterness and even hatred, many areas of our lives can suffer. When we're unforgiving, it's we who pay the price over and over. We may bring our anger and bitterness into every relationship and new experience. Our lives may be so wrapped up in the wrong that we can't enjoy the present. Other signs that it may be time to consider forgiveness include:

  • Dwelling on the events surrounding the offense
  • Hearing from others that you have a chip on your shoulder or that you're wallowing in self-pity
  • Being avoided by family and friends because they don't enjoy being around you
  • Having angry outbursts at the smallest perceived slights
  • Often feeling misunderstood
  • Drinking excessively, smoking or using drugs to try to cope with your pain
  • Having symptoms of depression or anxiety
  • Being consumed by a desire for revenge or punishment
  • Automatically thinking the worst about people or situations
  • Regretting the loss of a valued relationship
  • Feeling like your life lacks meaning or purpose
  • Feeling at odds with your religious or spiritual beliefs

The bottom line is that you may often feel miserable in your current life.

How do I reach a state of forgiveness?

Forgiveness is a commitment to a process of change. It can be difficult and it can take time. Everyone moves toward forgiveness a little differently. One step is to recognize the value of forgiveness and its importance in our lives at a given time. Another is to reflect on the facts of the situation, how we've reacted, and how this combination has affected our lives, our health and our well-being. Then, as we are ready, we can actively choose to forgive the one who has offended us. In this way, we move away from our role as a victim and release the control and power the offending person and situation have had in our lives.

Forgiveness also means that we change old patterns of beliefs and actions that are driven by our bitterness. As we let go of grudges, we'll no longer define our lives by how we've been hurt, and we may even find compassion and understanding.

What happens if I can't forgive someone?

Forgiveness can be very challenging. It may be particularly hard to forgive someone who doesn't admit wrong or doesn't speak of their sorrow. Keep in mind that the key benefits of forgiveness are for you. If you find yourself stuck, it may be helpful to take some time to talk with a person you've found to be wise and compassionate, such as a spiritual leader, a mental health provider or an unbiased family member or friend.

It may also be helpful to reflect on times you've hurt others and on those who have forgiven you. As you recall how you felt, it may help you to understand the position of the person who hurt you. It can also be beneficial to pray, use guided meditation or journal. In any case, if the intention to forgive is present, forgiveness will come in its time.

Does forgiveness guarantee reconciliation?

Not always. In some cases, reconciliation may be impossible because the offender has died. In other cases, reconciliation may not be appropriate, especially if you were attacked or assaulted. But even in those cases, forgiveness is still possible, even if reconciliation isn't.

On the other hand, if the hurtful event involved a family member or friend whose relationship you otherwise value, forgiveness may lead to reconciliation. This may not happen quickly, as you both may need time to re-establish trust. But in the end, your relationship may very well be one that is rich and fulfilling.

What if I have to interact with the person who hurt me but I don't want to?

These situations are difficult. If the hurt involves a family member, it may not always be possible to avoid him or her entirely. You may be invited to the same family holiday gatherings, for instance. If you've reached a state of forgiveness, you may be able to enjoy these gatherings without bringing up the old hurts. If you haven't reached forgiveness, these gatherings may be tense and stressful for everyone, particularly if other family members have chosen sides in the conflict.

So how do you handle this? First, remember that you do have a choice whether to attend or not attend family get-togethers. Respect yourself and do what seems best. If you choose to go, don't be surprised by a certain amount of awkwardness and perhaps even more intense feelings. It's important to keep an eye on those feelings. You don't want them to lead you to be unjust or unkind in return for what was done to you.

Also, avoid drinking too much alcohol as a way to try to numb your feelings or feel better — it'll likely backfire. And keep an open heart and mind. People do change, and perhaps the offender will want to apologize or make amends. You also may find that the gathering helps you to move forward with forgiveness.

How do I know when I've truly forgiven someone?

Forgiveness may result in sincerely spoken words such as "I forgive you" or tender actions that fit the relationship. But more than this, forgiveness brings a kind of peace that helps you go on with life. The offense is no longer front and center in your thoughts or feelings. Your hostility, resentment and misery have made way for compassion, kindness and peace.

Also, remember that forgiveness often isn't a one-time thing. It begins with a decision, but because memories or another set of words or actions may trigger old feelings, you may need to recommit to forgiveness over and over again.

What if the person I'm forgiving doesn't change?

Getting the other person to change their actions, behavior or words isn't the point of forgiveness. In fact, the other person may never change or apologize for the offense. Think of forgiveness more about how it can change your life — by bringing you more peace, happiness, and emotional and spiritual healing.

Forgiveness takes away the power the other person continues to wield in your life. Through forgiveness, you choose to no longer define yourself as a victim. Forgiveness is done primarily for yourself, and less so for the person who wronged you.

What if I'm the one who needs forgiveness?

It may help to spend some time thinking about the offense you've committed and trying to determine the effect it has had on others. Unless it may cause more harm or distress, consider admitting the wrong you've done to those you've harmed, speaking of your sincere sorrow or regret, and specifically asking for forgiveness — without making excuses.

But if this seems unwise because it may further harm or distress, don't do it — it's not about making yourself feel better by apologizing. You don't want to add salt to a painful wound. Also, keep in mind that you can't force someone to forgive you. They will need to move to forgiveness in their own time.

In any case, we have to be willing to forgive ourselves. Holding on to resentment against yourself can be just as toxic as holding on to resentment against someone else. Recognize that poor behavior or mistakes don't make you worthless or bad.

Accept the fact that you — like everyone else — aren't perfect. Accept yourself despite your faults. Admit your mistakes. Commit to treating others with compassion, empathy and respect. And again, talking with a spiritual leader, mental health provider or trusted friend or relative may be helpful.

Forgiveness of yourself or someone else, though not easy, can transform your life. Instead of dwelling on the injustice and revenge, instead of being angry and bitter, you can move toward a life of peace, compassion, mercy, joy and kindness.

Forgiveness: How to let go of grudges and bitterness -


I found this post to be interesting and useful, I hope it is useful to you as well. Heading into the holiday season; old hurts and such tend to resurface. Perhaps this will help to make the holidays more of a celebration than a trial by fire.

Life is a journey, enjoy the trip.
Mary E. Robbins
Robbins Run Ranch: Living the Dream in Wyoming
Beautiful Pomeranians

Independent Beachbody Coach: Fighting Obesity One Person at a Time

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Whoo... another 3 lbs down!

Monday I got on the scale. Lost one pound from monday to monday. weighed 279. Did my wed weigh today. Dropped 3 more lbs. 276. That's 9 lbs down since october 5th, 23 lbs total down for the yr. 27 lbs left for my 50 lb goal this yr! rockin it off! Shakeology, Hip Hop Abs, Turbo Jam, journaling my food intake. Whoo Hoo! makin it happen!

Team Beachbody® Coach Mary Robbins |

Robbins Run Ranch: Living the Dream In Wyoming

Monday, October 19, 2009

Increased Scrutiny of Flea and Tick Control Products for Pets

Heads up folks... be careful of what you use. These products can be dangerous for your pets! For that matter they can be dangerous for you and your children as well.

The following article is from the EPA's website.

Remember your furry friends depend on you being well informed, and using good judgement.

Increased Scrutiny of Flea and Tick Control Products for Pets

The U.S. Environmental Protection Agency is intensifying its evaluation of spot-on pesticide products for flea and tick control due to recent increases in the number of reported adverse reactions in pets treated with these products. Adverse reactions reported range from mild effects such as skin irritation to more serious effects such as seizures and, in some cases, death of the pet.

Flea and tick products can be appropriate treatments for protecting your pets and your family’s health because fleas and ticks can transmit disease. While many people use the products with no harm to their pets, EPA recommends that pet owners take precautions when using these products. People should carefully follow label directions and monitor their pets for any signs of an adverse reaction after application, particularly when using these products for the first time. Also, before use of these products on weak, aged, medicated, sick, pregnant or nursing pets, or on pets that have previously shown signs of sensitivity to pesticide products, EPA recommends that a veterinarian be consulted. Additional safety tips are available for taking care of fleas and ticks on your pet.

Pets may experience adverse reactions from flea and tick control products, including spot-on treatments, sprays, collars and shampoos. However, the majority of reports to EPA are related to flea and tick treatments with EPA-registered spot-on products. Spot-on products are generally sold in tubes or vials and are applied to one or more localized areas on the body of the pet, such as in between the shoulders or in a stripe along the back.

List of Registered Products

EPA has provided a listing of EPA-registered spot-on flea and tick products (10 pp, 63k, About PDF). Since the chart previously located on this page reflected only a portion of the numerous pet spot-on products available, EPA felt that pet owners and consumers might be led to believe that only those products listed were the focus of concern. In fact, EPA is intensifying its evaluation of all spot-on products and is providing a more comprehensive list of these products.

EPA is not initiating a product recall of these products nor is the Agency suggesting that the products not be used. EPA recognizes the importance of the products in effective flea and tick control. EPA’s objective at this stage is simply to advise consumers and pet owners to exercise caution when using the products and to monitor pet behavior following their use, as some animals have experienced adverse reactions following treatment.

Regulatory Agencies are Taking Action

EPA is evaluating all available data and information, including:

  • reports of adverse reactions,
  • product market share,
  • clarity of product use directions and label warnings,
  • product ingredients, and
  • pre-market safety data submitted to the Agency in support of registration of these products

This assessment may result in EPA action to require changes in the registration status of certain spot-on products. EPA will be working collaboratively with Health Canada to address this issue, as Canadian regulatory officials have identified similar concerns about the use of spot-on flea and tick products. EPA will be updating this page periodically to provide the public with the most current information on this issue.

Health Canada has identified similar concerns about the use of spot-on flea and tick products. EPA and Health Canada met with product manufacturers to begin discussions about this issue. Read about the May 5, 2009 EPA spot-on meeting with registrants (20 pp, 2.9 MB, About PDF).

For more information

For more information, please visit EPA's Pesticides Q&A database.

Increased Scrutiny of Flea and Tick Control Products for Pets | Pesticides | US EPA

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Life is a journey, the trip is much more pleasurable with furry friends!

Mary E. Robbins
Happy Healthy Hairballs: Otherwise known as Pomeranians
Robbins Run Ranch: Living the Dream in Wyoming

Independent Team Beachbody Coach: Fighting Obesity one Person at a Time

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

The Wisdom to Know the Difference

So many of us feel responsible for everything. That’s what I said, every friggin thing. Hello folks some things are out of our control. The thing is to live proactively, rather than feeling guilty about something you could not have done anything about anyway, and being beaten and knocked about living reactively.

Am I talking to myself as well, oh yeah. Of course I am. Don’t all writers…lol. This life is a wonderful gift to be appreciated and enjoyed. Not a curse to be slogged through and endured. The same circumstance can surround 2 different people, with to totally different effects on their lives. What makes the difference?

Each person’s attitude. The winds blow on all of us, it’s up to us how we set our sails.

Came across this article on beliefnet. Enjoy.

Living the Serenity Prayer:
By Eileen Flanagan

Many of us know and love the Serenity Prayer:

The Wisdom to Know the Difference

God, grant us serenity to accept the things we cannot change,
Courage to change the things we can,
And wisdom to know the difference.

Many of us spend too much time anxious about things we cannot change: the economy, the weather, traffic on the freeway, or people who annoy us. As a result, we don’t have the energy to make the most of the opportunities we do have. Recognizing the difference between what we can and cannot change can help us live more peaceful and productive lives.

Acknowledge Your Conditioning

Some people have a harder time with the first line of the Serenity Prayer, accepting the things they cannot change, while others have a harder time mustering the courage to change what they can. Often these patterns can be traced to family or cultural conditioning. Reflect on the messages you received growing up. Were you expected to be passive and submit to what others wanted? Were you trained to be in control, so that letting go is more difficult for you today? Sometimes just acknowledging your family or social conditioning can help you to let go of old patterns that are no longer serving you.

Pay Attention to Your Inner Voice

When you get a feeling that something isn't right, pay attention. That may be a sign of something you need to change. We human beings have a tremendous ability to deny our inner truths or talk ourselves out of making changes that might seem scary or difficult at first, but usually we know what is right deep down. Pay special attention to intuitions that persist over time or that come with a sense of peace and clarity. The more you pay attention to your Inner Voice, the more clearly it will guide you.

Know Yourself

Many spiritual traditions teach that knowing yourself is a lifelong pursuit, but one that can help you feel more at peace with yourself and other people. Spending time alone—walking in the woods, meditating, or journaling—can put you in touch with what's really going on inside you. When you acknowledge these feelings, you can make a conscious choice about what to accept and what to change, rather than letting yourself be ruled by unconscious feelings.

Learn from Your Mistakes

Everyone makes mistakes, but many of us waste too much energy beating ourselves up over them. While psychologists have not agreed on one standard definition of wisdom, they do agree that one of the qualities wise people share is the ability to learn from their mistakes. When things don't go the way you hoped, instead of focusing on what you did wrong or what someone else did to mess things up, think about what you might do differently next time.

Cultivate Optimism

Monitor your pessimistic thoughts and try to find evidence to refute them. Psychologists have found it is particularly helpful to censor categorical words like "never" from your thinking. Just because something didn't work out last time, that doesn't mean it won't work next time. Instead of simply repeating positive affirmations, point out to yourself the things that you can do to bring a more positive result in the future. Cultivating optimism has been shown to make it much more likely you'll be able to change the things you can, as well as accept the things you can't.

Practice Letting Go

Life is full of opportunities to let go and trust. Practice with the little things: a lost earring, a flat tire, or an uncooperative toddler. In such situations, take a deep breath and monitor your thoughts. If you are angry or frustrated, don't pretend you are not. Just observe your own emotion, and then see if you can release it with a deep breath. For many people, prayer helps. Turning a problem over to a Higher Power can bring tremendous relief.

Cultivate Community

Whether it's a religious congregation, a Twelve-Step group, or just a gang of really good friends, community can help us develop wisdom. We need people who will tell us when we're acting wimpy or pigheaded, as well as point out our strengths and encourage them. We also need people who will support us when we hit tough times and cheer for us when we succeed. If you don't have such support in your life, think about where you might be able to find it. If you do have people like that, count them among your blessings.

The Wisdom to Know the Difference - Living the Serenity Prayer -

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Eileen Flanagan is the author of The Wisdom to Know the Difference: When to Make a Change–and When to Let Go. Visit her website

Life is a journey, enjoy the trip.
Mary E. Robbins
Robbins Run Ranch: Living the Dream in Wyoming
Happy Healthy Hairballs: otherwise known as Pomeranians

Independent Beachbody Coach: Fighting Obesity one Person at a Time.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009


(This post is related to the 30 day project from the Ed Severance Blog: Rewire the Damaged Hardware post)

30 Days to change the way I think: to rewire the damaged hardware.

Hmmmm. What would be the foremost, the optimum thing to change. To truly create the life I want to live. God has given me the ability to create the life I know I want to be living!

Ok, so what am I working on? The list seems insurmountable. Goes on and on adinfanitum. Bits of this and bits of that, list after list. Truth be told all of it fits under a couple of points. One word is the major player. So what is it? It is: F-E-A-R. That’s it fear. Such a small little word, only four small letters to have such a huge impact on so many people’s lives. Yes I know I’m not alone in this.

Ok, so the list of fears could go on and on. Big fears, little fears, erotic fears, infinitesimal fears, probably a few psychotic fears.

So what is the heading, or umbrella that all these fears are running around under? What is it?! It’s not fear of failure. Failure is a very safe place to hide. It’s not fear of fat. A fat suit is another safe place to hide. Fear of discovery. The fear that you may see who I really am.
Nah, I’ve pretty much put that out there. Amazingly enough I actually like myself. Fat a** and all.

Ok so what is it. What has been tripping me up for so many years. The self sabotage queen. Grrr. Truth be told it really pisses me off. You know what? I do know what it is. I actually do. Ok so what is it?! It’s Fear of success. Not fear of failure. Fear of Success.

Fear of reaching my goals and finding the reward to be an empty thing indeed. If you don’t open that bright shiny door, you can’t find out that there is nothing there.

Ok so now I know what it is. Now what do I do about it. What is success really? Ask 50 different people that question and you’ll get 50 different answers. So what does that say? It says that success is something different to each person.

Ok, so what is success to me? Stripped of all the pomp and circumstance, just the bare bones of it. What is success to me?

• Is it being a millionaire? Nope, although that can be a side effect. Note the can be, not always is.
• Is it losing 150 pounds? No
• Is it being married for nearly 20 years, and actually still loving your partner? Nope
• Is it owning multiple homes? Nope
• Is it completing a marathon? Nope
• Is it graduating from university? Nope

Ok, this list of questions could go on forever. So what is it and why have I been tripping over it.

First what is success to me: It is a mindset. A way of being, a way of living.

Ok, it’s true. This is a relatively new definition of success for me. Over the years my definition of success or a successful person has changed dramatically.

In the past my definition of success was wealth. As in monetary wealth. Over the years I have found that definition to be false. There are some extremely wealthy people that are not successful. Wealth can be a nice benefit of success, but it is not success. If it were it would be an empty thing indeed.

At one point I defined success as career achievement. Then I looked around at executives defrauding people, and their life’s work disappearing before their eyes. False housing booms, and manipulated stock markets. And I thought this is not success.

I looked at marathoners, gymnasts, football players, Olympians. Medal winners, and thought perhaps that was success. Only to observe the dissatisfaction in so many of their lives, and thought this is not success.

I’ve watched churches turn in on themselves and spew venom and hatred in the name of their God; and I thought this is not success either.

And I wondered is all naught? Do I even want to be successful? Not by those definitions I don’t. Seriously, what’s the point? Emptiness and self loathing ala carte. Thanks anyway I’ll pass. Been there done that. Over it.

It’s not fear of success per se. It’s fear that I’ll achieve financial, physical, religious, whatever success and find it to be an empty barren thing. The fear that I’ll become a cardboard cutout of who I actually am. Empty of life other than desolation and rage. Look around they are all over the place. Here and there you see the cardboard rip and they unload an Uzi on everyone around them. Wouldn’t have to be an Uzi, an emptied milk jug with a few common household chemicals would be just as effective if not more so. Enough said, I’m not going there.

Ok so how do I untie my hands, so to speak? How do I stop the self sabotage and allow myself to follow through on some projects I find interesting.

That is the question. So what is the answer? Thinking, pondering, fingers are twitching with the urge to write something.

The answer, you do realize that each person’s answer is individual. Yes? So what is my answer. Tapping on the mouse, waiting for words to come. Concept is there, now to get it into actual words.

Success is a mindset. A way of being, a way of living.

Yeah ok, so success is a mindset, a way of being a way of living. Big woop, what is the practical application of that?

Ok, here goes. Rather than letting your wealth, or lack thereof, work, athletic prowess, religious endeavors, life events, happenings, relationships, whatever you encounter in your journey through this life define who you are; what you are, whether you are a success or failure in this life, you define your life, rather than the events in your life defining you.

Clear as mud?

Be who you are.

I am that I am. I am at peace within myself, I appreciate the beauty of each day. I live now, fully in each moment that occurs. I accept and love myself as I am, therefore I am free to love others.

As such, I am a success, my life is successful.

I am no longer in bondage, I am free.

Life is a journey, enjoy the trip
Mary E. Robbins

Robbins Run Ranch: Living the Dream in Wyoming
Happy Healthy Hairballs: Otherwise Known as Pomeranians

Independent Beachbody Coach: Fighting Obesity One Person at a Time

Monday, October 12, 2009

Whoo Hoo! Lost a total of 5 pounds this week.

Whoo Hoo! Lost a total of 5 pounds this week. Journaling what I eat and doing the ranch workout. Rockin it baby. Been logging into Beachbody and the online gym all week too! Whoo Hoo! I did measure, unfortunately I did not have any change in the measurements that I did. That will come. I didn’t do hip hop abs or any other dvd workout this past week. I will be adding some back in this week; in addition to slogging about in the snow…lol… I overloaded and crashed a couple of weeks ago. So am being a bit more conservative.

Frankly I do not have the time to crash. So a consistent build is for me rather than a total overload. I’ve been watching the Biggest Loser. It would be great to be able to put hours into the gym. However I am not living on the Biggest Loser Ranch. I am living on Robbins Run Ranch, so a big part of my day is taking care of business here. Frankly I am pretty excited about a 5 pound loss. Whoo Hoo! Kind of giddy actually at the prospect of meeting my 50 pound weight loss goal for the year. It’s really happening! I am really doing it! One day, one step, one pound at a time.

Keeping the food journal has been a boon. (a good thing) Writing things down actually calls to mind what is being eaten; and has helped in the change in mindset towards food. I am eating now because I am hungry, not out of frustration, anger, stress, boredom, etc. Anger does still trigger an urge to eat but not an uncontrollable one. 

I am using Shakeology. It is excellent when I workout first thing in the morning. Mix it up and have it after my workout. It helps in muscle recovery and keeps my energy level up. Not psycho buzzing up, as in a speed overload. But healthy, cognitive, good frame of mind for a productive day up. Lol…

It makes an excellent breakfast for me when I’ve worked out early a.m.

The hunger monster has been jumping on my back in the evenings. I think I’m going to try out the Shakeology for my evening snack or dinner. See how that works out with the growling stomach at night…lol. Really do not want to eat for a couple of hours before bedtime. But having that protein, vitamin and mineral boost in the evening will give my body the protein and nutrients it needs to replenish itself while I am sleeping.

Want to get into a stretching routine before bed. Not set in stone, but a good stretching routine at the end of the day would be excellent for my body.

Yes I want the fat off, but I do not want to be a flappy skin monster either. So stretching and working out is a must.

It’s a glorious Day outside! We’ve had over a foot of snow fall this last go around. Between the last 2 days of snow it is knee deep in most places around the ranch. Absolutely great for the pastures. It amazes me how much the amount of snow fall can vary over just a few miles. I believe there were 6 or 8 inches in Torrington. Or maybe that was 6 or 8 additional inches. I’m not sure. The actual town of Torrington is about 17 miles from us.

It was so calm outside this morning. Just beautiful calm, no wind at all. It’s 26 degrees out and feels warm to me, because of the lack of wind. Totally amazing. The hairballs are out playing in the snow having a grand time. The doors we put on the calf hutches really worked well. The houses are warm and dry inside. Gives the hairballs a great dry place to play after bouncing around out in the snow.

Keep in mind folks, unless your pets are acclimated to the weather they can become hypothermic just like you can. I’m loving it outside but I’ve been out in it. So going outside in calm weather at 26 degrees doesn’t feel cold to me.

If/when the wind picks up the wind chill will drop body temps in a hurry without adequate protection. Translated it will freeze you to death in a hurry. Your pets too.

I’ve been pretty happy with my snow ranch workouts. As in slogging through knee deep snow. Dragging 100 ft of water hose and feed tubs. But I pace myself and have been working out in it. Pay attention to your body or you will give yourself a heart attack.

As in from the couch directly to the sidewalk shoveling snow if you have not been active at all. Pace yourself people. The early winter round of heart attacks are waiting in the wings; so to speak. Be smart, take care of that body you are living in. It’s the only one you have.

Have a glorious day!

Life is a journey, I am enjoying the trip.
Mary E. Robbins
Robbins Run Ranch: Living the Dream in Wyoming
Beautiful Pomeranians

Independent Beachbody Coach: Fighting Obesity one Person at a Time.

Sunday, October 11, 2009

Rewire the Damaged Hardware: Ed Severance Blog

He has something good to say… so I am passing it on! Well worth the read. Think about it, change your focus, change the way you think and change your life.

Life is a journey, whether you enjoy the trip or not is up to you.

Mary E. Robbins
Robbins Run Ranch: Living the Dream in Wyoming
Beautiful Pomeranians

Independent Beachbody Coach: Fighting Obesity One Person at a Time

By the time you reach, (or reached) 35 years of age, 90% of what you do requires no real thought! Spend a few minutes contemplating the previous sentence. Almost everything you do, you simply do it. Put the keys in your car ignition as an example. How much time does it take for you do accomplish this? You don’t even spend seconds considering it do you. It’s just done. Pick up a fork to eat your favorite meal. Once again, there is no consideration as to how to configure this action. You simply grab the fork and dig in! Walking or running for exercise. You think, decide and do all in less than a second. For all the many positive things you do every single day, such actions have been determined for years! Humans are all conditioned human beings from birth until now.

The challenge is that the same examples can be used for negative thought patterns. The reasons are limitless as to why, but you keep getting the same negative behaviors and outcomes in your life. This is why you are reading this blog. This is why you have made a fantastic choice to take on this 30 day journey. You want to change you’re thinking because you are getting the same crappy results! What you will do is rewire your old hardwired way of thinking.

You have probably had to rewire an electric cord sometime in your life. One of our too many televisions sets in my home went on the blink. One of our too many pets decided to chew on the cord while the cord was not attached to the electric outlet thank God! Now the tv works again. But to get what was damaged, not useful working, I had to cut the cord, strip the outer layers of rubber, rewire the electric lines to each other, wrap electrical tape around the new connections and bingo. Now the television works and my kids can watch, ‘Spongebob Squarepants,’ ‘Top Chef-Vegas,’ ‘Discovery Channel,’ and enjoy taking time to learn or simply laugh. You will be doing the same thing with your mind that I did with the tv. Rewiring negative, non-productive, damaging, destructive thought patterns that exhibits new thought paradigms. New thinking, new results and one happy camper!

Your brain is a miracle. There really are no words to describe this ‘gift’ God has given you. Thousands of neural networks, interwoven to create thought patterns. Many needed, many useful and creative habits. Yet some impair you, cause you pain, disappointment, even maybe a the thought can I ever succeed. You act as you do because it is what you truly believe. You are what you produce. “As a man thinks in their heart, so is he,’ Proverbs 23:7. But what is wired can be rewired. What is useful can be strengthened and those thought alliances that must be torn down can be. So let’s get started.

You have your conscious and subconscious. You probably know a ton about the conscious because this is where ‘you live.’ ”I think, therefore I am,” declared Rene Descartes. But to change your habitual way of thinking will need to come from your subconscious. Your six intellectual faculties included your will, reason, perception, imagination, memory and intuition. And your imagination will be a key ingredient in getting you to new and powerful thought processes.

The imagination is not ‘kids stuff.’ What is the ‘adult’ purpose for your imagination? Was it only to be employed as a child in elementary school? For games with your friends when you were Superman or Spiderman, an astronaut flying into outer space, the first girl president of the United States, etc.? Investigate one of the most admired, respected leading thinkers of our time Albert Einstein when he wrote, “When I examine myself and my methods of thought, I come to the conclusion that the gift of fantasy has meant more to me than my talent for absorbing positive knowledge.”

So how does the imagination lead to the kind of thinking and results that you want? Memorize the following:
1. a positive thought (conscious) produces desire
2. a positive desire, (subconscious) creates emotion
3. a positive emotion compels you to action
4. a positive action gets you results

The conscious part of you accepts and rejects information. The subconscious only ‘accepts’ what you believe as real, correct, truth and it is from the subconscious that you act, not the conscious. This is why like all great thinkers, Bob Proctor, John Assaraf, Tony Robbins, Mary Morrissey, Albert Einstein, you must focus in on changing your conscious thinking and beliefs via your subconscious. See, discover that this is you and the opportunity you have to live as you deserve and desire.

Start each morning off in a positive fashion! First thoughts that are exciting, first actions are progressive, forget about the internet, news, any work and prepare yourself. Put on music that invigorates you, quote successful thoughts that gives you a great feeling. When you feel good you are ready to move forward. This is critical, vital, pivotal, urgent, serious, consequential, momentous, key, impactful, central, essential, fundamental. When you start off on the right foot, your energy for taking the time to create something positive is at a high level. Begin your day on the wrong foot, negative thinking which directs you to procrastinate, you are screwed! And this is a HUGE issue for some of you reading this blog. You must start each day ready to rock and roll!

For these next thirty days, choose one or two of the most important paradigms you want to recreate. If it has taken years to develop and live in habits that are not productive, you will not completely change you’re thinking patterns in 30 days. This is why I highly recommend you work on one or two issues. Once successful you will have the courage, desire and tenacity to move forward on other areas for personal improvement.

When you are positioned in a relaxed state, you can have very quiet music playing in the background, (screamo is not recommended!) scanning a beautiful sky or even a soothing screen saver to assist in building the right frame of mind.

Now close your eyes and begin to visualize what it is you are here for. What is the correct way you want to think and see yourself actually involved in the picture. Here are several examples.Pool You have a pool in your backyard. Visualize how cool or warm the temperature is. Do you feel it? Was it cool or warm? What is the sound of water like when you lift your foot out and the water splash’s back into your pool? Since your foot is used to the crystal, clear water, now put in your foot up to the ankle. How does your body react to the water? This example gives you sight, creativity, sound, and sensation. Imagine riding alone on a Harley Davidson motorcycle on a straight stretch of highway with no one around you. Harley 2Feel the vibration of the engine, hear the sound of the motor, feel the wind whipping though your hair, (or on your head if you need hair!) looking out and exploring mountains, or a lake, a farm, etc.

Now take this example and transfer the picture of what you just experienced into what is it you want to accomplish! And as you visualize it, also speak out what you want. ”I will no longer react instantly in anger. I am in control of my emotions” and see yourself acting in such a way within your imagination towards those you struggle with containing your anger. View yourself as responding and not reacting. Or use your fantasy as seeing yourself pushing through that fear that has captured you for so long and held you back from obtaining what it is you want. ”I’m so grateful that I have the courage to be honest.” ”I so grateful that I made the sale.” ”I’m on an airplane and I am not filled with fear.” ”I can make good, strong decisions.” ”Look at me, I am a solid leader.” ”I am succeeding in this business.”

What is literally taking place within your brain is amazing! Old hard, negative, destructive networks are slowly but surely being broken down. Creative, faith building, powerful and positive networks are either being reinforced or taking shape. Think about this. You are truly creating the life you want to live. Isn’t that incredible? That God would give you the ability to create the life you know you want to be living!

Persistence, consistent persistence is a law for success. Do not become discouraged. This is one of your biggest problems, so why continue to live this same lifestyle? Stick with this for 30 days. You are building an intellectual habit that will change your life. Please share what is really transpiring in your journey. Are you experiencing forward movement, struggling, seeing improvement, excited?

Change your thinking and change your results!

Ed Severance

Ed Reduced

Ed Severance Blog

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Friday, October 09, 2009

Team Beachbody Coach

Celebrating... got on the scale... lost 3 more pounds! that puts me at
281lbs. 4 lbs lost so far this week. 32 lbs to go to meet my 50 lb wt
loss goal for this yr. 132 lbs to go for total wt loss goal of 150
lbs... doin it!

Team Beachbody Coach

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Monday, October 05, 2009

When Someone Hurts You: Not Fair? or, Not Right? - Vibrant Nation

The following is a post from vibrant nation... something to think about. It was of value to me... I hope it is to you as well.

Life is a journey, enjoy the trip.
Mary E. Robbins
Robbins Run Ranch
Fitness & Weight Loss Consultant

When something goes awry, we have two ways of viewing the circumstances in order to make sense of them.

Let's use an exaggerated example to make the point: Let's say you promised your sister that if you win the lottery, you will write her a check for $100,000. Then, let's say you did not win the lottery. How would you feel if your sister told you and anyone with ears that you owe her $100,000, and that you refused to honor your word, which was nothing more than a cruel lie?"

You might say, "That's not fair!"

If so, ask yourself, "What is it that is not fair?"

Your answer might be: what my sister did to me--what she said about me--is not fair.

In this way, you can give voice to your perception that an injustice has been done. Your sister did something that hurt you, and you think about it in terms of fairness.

It is a very likely in this case that you will also think in terns of a perpetrator and a victim. To boil it down further, you feel that your sister has done something to you and that you are the victim of her behavior: she has twisted your good intention into a promise, which she claims you failed to honor. She is not being fair to you.

In other words, you react to this injustice by declaring yourself the victim. You stand accused of something you did not do. Not fair.

But another reaction to the same situation could be, "This is wrong."

Ask yourself, "What is it that is wrong?"

Your answer: The way my sister treated me--what she said about me--is wrong.

The situation shifts. The focus is no longer on you as the victim of someone else's bad behavior. It is now on the idea that your sister made a decision that is wrong. Her analysis of the facts is incorrect. She made a mistake.

The fact is that mistakes like this probably make her feel miserable. Remember that only a miserable person would feel a need to do something like what she did to you in the first place. No one misconstrues the truth like that out of happiness and contentment.

I'm not suggesting that you rush to embrace your unfortunate sister for her weak discernment skills. To the contrary, I believe that her choices create her life, and that her life is probably full of things she has created which she now trips over regularly. Which are not your responsibility.

The point I am trying to make is that your sister's behavior is not about you unless you choose to make it about you. You may choose to see her lie about the lottery money as a misguided departure from the truth, or you may choose to see it as something mean she has done to you.

You choose to see the incident as being unfair or wrong.

Of course, the incident described above is both: it is unfair and it is wrong. But if you choose to see it only as unfair, you are likely choosing the role of victim for yourself, a role that is not inherent in the facts of the case.

I bring this up because I see it as a way to set yourself free. Allow the choices someone else makes to reflect on her, and believe that the consequences of her choices pave the path of her life. In this way you can see that you are not part of the equation: you do not have to accept her wrong view of something just because she wants you to accept it.

This is your choice, and the same applies to you as to your sister: your choices pave the path of your life. Why litter it with misconceptions about the behavior of others, litter that can trip you and make you feel like a victim, powerless to change anything or move forward until justice is done? Victims are stuck. You don't want to be stuck, do you?

Something can be both unfair and wrong, and it can affect you deeply, but it doesn't have the power to mandate your response. That response is yours to choose.

When Someone Hurts You: Not Fair? or, Not Right? - Vibrant Nation

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Sunday, October 04, 2009

Friday, October 02, 2009

'Daily Affirmation' Video