Musings...

Coughing again this morning. Not quite as bad as yesterday… drank some apple cider vinegar and hot water… that seemed to help clear the mucus out of my throat… had my honey as well… took some generic musinex sinus and 2 aspirin.

Not much for breakfast… part of an English muffin toasted with butter and a bit of grape jelly… probably 2/3 of it… gave the rest to Sara and Diesel.

Thought the washer quit working… turned out to be the plug in electrical tail I was using… thank God for that… at any rate it is working now.

Ran into the widow of a good friend yesterday. She is the wife of the gentleman that used to be our UPS driver that came out to the ranch. Over the years we had become good friends. His body died of pancreatic cancer shortly after he retired. They found out he had it… and 6 weeks later he was gone. He crossed over 2 years ago… I can still see his smiling face when he came with packages and visited a bit… looking at the pom puppies.

It was obvious from visiting with her yesterday that they were best friends and truly loved each other. It is such a gift to have friendship and love like that in this life… on the flip side it is so… what word covers it… there really are none. When they move on ahead and we are still in this life. I miss David so much… feels like my heart is being ripped from my chest…

Ok… just breathe… one breath then another… calm… Here comes another day.

It’s so strange how these bodies react to this kind of stress….not just in humans either. I remember when Miss Priss died. … she was a female cockatiel. She and Pete had been together for years. He went into screaming crying mourning for weeks… he was so devastated that I thought he was going to die….we accepted another cockatiel from my mom that was being picked on and brought him home and put him in the cage with Pete… hoping that having some other bird company would help him. They grumped and fussed at each other… and eventually got along. Now they are 2 grumpy old men hanging out watching TV.

Yes, Pete and Blue hang on the side of their cage and watch TV. Both of them are mourning David… he loved those birds….and always visited with them when he took their sleeping cover off. Pete and Blue, have been together now for …. Geez the time has all run together… well nearly 10 years… Pete has been with us nearly 20. Pete and Priss loved each other… and were together before they came to be with us as well…. Guess I’ll go turn on the morning show for them that they and David used to watch… HLN or CNN… he would flip back and forth, watching them both. He enjoyed Robin Meade and Natasha Curry.

He was so happy that he no longer had to always be on alert for a call from the railroad. He was out there between 36 and 37 years. He was really good at his work… I know this because I worked with him years back. The man knew his stuff.

He loved trains; he and Jerry would go and see the steam engines when they came through. He knew so much about the various engines. I liked to watch the train programs on TV with him and hear him tell about the engines. I had gotten him a couple of Train trip DVDs for Christmas this year… and of course gave them to him early… I always seemed to do that… give him whatever I’d gotten for him as soon as it came in …. Rather than keeping things for holidays and such. Anyway, one DVD was across the United States, and the other was across Canada. It was fun watching them with him.

We talked about how it would be a fun trip… and how when we were feeling better maybe we could go on one of them. Guess he took a different trip.

Another friend’s husband died this week. Another partnership ended early… seems like whenever one goes before the other the partnership is ended early for this life no matter what the actual age is. My thoughts and prayers go out to her.

This life is certainly an ever changing landscape from birth… through childhood… teen years… young adult… middle age… seniors and exit… of course one never knows when that exit is going to slip in there. For my child it was before birth. Just had a few precious moments with his wonderful soul… yes I could feel his presence. No I am not sure the body would be male… doesn’t matter… I look forward to reuniting on the other side… I wonder … has my mom gotten to meet her grandchild now… I hope so. She was so excited… had just bought a baby book … we had just seen his heart beat and listened to it… then our time with him was over and in a rush of hemorrhage he was gone from this life… mom would have been a wonderful grandma to him. She did great with my youngest step son… the older ones didn’t want anything to do with either of us. Broke my heart … broke mom’s heart… and broke David’s heart.

I guess I just do not understand why people are … hmmmmm… how to say this… if someone you love is happy… why not celebrate their happiness. I’ve never understood that. Whether it’s friend or family… whomever the loved one is… celebrate their joy… it takes nothing away from you… in actuality it increases the joy and love in your own life…

May you walk in peace…

Mary E. Robbins
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Beachbody Health and Fitness Coach
Robbins Run Ranch