August… one month closer to autumn. My favorite season. I hope autumn lasts for months this year.
I am finally getting into position to place some of the dogs. Frankly having this many here has taken a serious toll; both on my business and myself. I mistakenly thought that I would have support in taking care of them. I was seriously in error on that point. Actually it was more wishful thinking than reality, if history is any indicator. Such has been the case my entire life with the persons in question.
Emotional storm aside, I made the necessary decisions on my own once again. Of course, I am the evil hag for doing so, yet once again.
Regardless of the machinations going on action has to be taken. Here goes. I believe I have made the best decision for; the dogs, and my immediate family; as well as my business.
Thankfully I now have others helping to place these wonderful little creatures. It’s not the dog’s fault that their previous owner refuses to make a decision regarding their welfare. Frankly I’ve had enough of this bullshit. If she is incapable of taking responsibility for her actions then she loses the privilege of doing so. Enough already!
This situation has been eating at me for over a year now. The dogs have had a year to recover from the awful flea/worm infestation they were living in. Now it’s time to start on socializing them and getting them into their new homes.
On the one hand it is heartbreaking to see them go. They have turned into absolutely beautiful little creatures. However it is better for them to be in a household. Better for me as well. There are simply too many here for me to take care of the way they should be taken care of.
They have feed, water, and shelter. They get a smile and a pat on the head, but at this point that’s all I can manage. Actually I wanted to place them all myself so I knew where they were going and had screened the applicants. Unfortunately I can not take care of the dogs, socialize them and place them. It is taking just about everything I have just to take care of their basic living requirements. Thank God- yes literally, there are folks to help place them.
I have hung in there for a year trying to work with the previous parties involved. They refuse to make decisions or to take action that is beneficial for the dogs. That is what it is about, what is best for the dogs involved. They didn’t ask to be put into a flea infested filth hole. But that is where they were. Disgusting health hazard, for both the dogs and the person living there. No I am not a miss priss, nor am I an excellent housekeeper. But there is a limit. What really gets me is that this person in question is a relative. This situation is heartbreaking, enraging, disgusting, and completely unnecessary. Yet there it is. It is so awful there that I can not breathe in that house. Yet there she is entrenched in absolute filth. Yes she has the option of living elsewhere.
Breaks my heart, sometimes I wonder if that’s not a big part of the reason she lives the way she does. I wonder could she actually be putting her own life in jeopardy to manipulate me. To get pity, play the martyr, the poor me bit. If that is the case she truly needs counseling.
No I am not so arrogant as to think that she can not live without me. I know that she can, frankly I wish she would live her life rather than trying to suck the joy out of mine.
I’ve been through his crap so many times with this person, yet it still gets to me. I don’t think she will ever find peace in this life. Ironically it’s because she chooses not to.
Realization: she must not want peace in this life. All this time I’ve been playing into her havoc. Trying to make things better for her. 48 years of hell, one crisis after another. One personal war after another. Always fighting through trying to make things better, when she has chosen to live in a war zone. When there is no war she creates on. When there is no crisis she creates one. That’s a big part of what happened with her dogs.
Refusal to make decisions, to take care of them so people will be drawn Into her “poor me I can’t take care of my dogs” come do it for me.
I can’t get out to my dogs, but I refuse to throw away the mountains of garbage piled in my yard. When you step in and clean it out it’s “Oh you cleaned it all out”, and then a week later she has thrown garbage all over the place again. Rather than in the dumpster.
Shake it off, let it go and move on. I can do nothing about the attitudes or living situations of people that refuse to help themselves. I can do something about how I live my life.
Yesterday I allowed their attitudes to infect me. I spent most of the day, sad, frustrated, and angry. I truth I went to bed angry last night and woke up angry. My dreams were even angry. I dreamt of this monster storm on the western horizon. I can still see it in my mind’s eye.
Truthfully that storm looked a lot like the emotional turmoil going on inside of me. In the past it has taken me out for days sometimes months at a time. Enough, if they want to live in their self made hell, so be it. I choose to live a different way. Actually live, taste the wonderful fruits of life, take responsibility for my life and the way I live it.
What they do is between them and their God. I give them up to God; they have free will and as a result are responsible for their own lives, and how they live them. Just as I am responsible for my life. Life is a gift; it’s up to you what you do with it.
Enough of this …
Thank you Lord for this Glorious August Day!
Life is a journey, Enjoy the Trip (or not-it’s up to you!)
Mary E. Robbins & the Hairballs
Robbins Run Ranch: Living the Dream With Our Pomeranians
307.788.0202
I am finally getting into position to place some of the dogs. Frankly having this many here has taken a serious toll; both on my business and myself. I mistakenly thought that I would have support in taking care of them. I was seriously in error on that point. Actually it was more wishful thinking than reality, if history is any indicator. Such has been the case my entire life with the persons in question.
Emotional storm aside, I made the necessary decisions on my own once again. Of course, I am the evil hag for doing so, yet once again.
Regardless of the machinations going on action has to be taken. Here goes. I believe I have made the best decision for; the dogs, and my immediate family; as well as my business.
Thankfully I now have others helping to place these wonderful little creatures. It’s not the dog’s fault that their previous owner refuses to make a decision regarding their welfare. Frankly I’ve had enough of this bullshit. If she is incapable of taking responsibility for her actions then she loses the privilege of doing so. Enough already!
This situation has been eating at me for over a year now. The dogs have had a year to recover from the awful flea/worm infestation they were living in. Now it’s time to start on socializing them and getting them into their new homes.
On the one hand it is heartbreaking to see them go. They have turned into absolutely beautiful little creatures. However it is better for them to be in a household. Better for me as well. There are simply too many here for me to take care of the way they should be taken care of.
They have feed, water, and shelter. They get a smile and a pat on the head, but at this point that’s all I can manage. Actually I wanted to place them all myself so I knew where they were going and had screened the applicants. Unfortunately I can not take care of the dogs, socialize them and place them. It is taking just about everything I have just to take care of their basic living requirements. Thank God- yes literally, there are folks to help place them.
I have hung in there for a year trying to work with the previous parties involved. They refuse to make decisions or to take action that is beneficial for the dogs. That is what it is about, what is best for the dogs involved. They didn’t ask to be put into a flea infested filth hole. But that is where they were. Disgusting health hazard, for both the dogs and the person living there. No I am not a miss priss, nor am I an excellent housekeeper. But there is a limit. What really gets me is that this person in question is a relative. This situation is heartbreaking, enraging, disgusting, and completely unnecessary. Yet there it is. It is so awful there that I can not breathe in that house. Yet there she is entrenched in absolute filth. Yes she has the option of living elsewhere.
Breaks my heart, sometimes I wonder if that’s not a big part of the reason she lives the way she does. I wonder could she actually be putting her own life in jeopardy to manipulate me. To get pity, play the martyr, the poor me bit. If that is the case she truly needs counseling.
No I am not so arrogant as to think that she can not live without me. I know that she can, frankly I wish she would live her life rather than trying to suck the joy out of mine.
I’ve been through his crap so many times with this person, yet it still gets to me. I don’t think she will ever find peace in this life. Ironically it’s because she chooses not to.
Realization: she must not want peace in this life. All this time I’ve been playing into her havoc. Trying to make things better for her. 48 years of hell, one crisis after another. One personal war after another. Always fighting through trying to make things better, when she has chosen to live in a war zone. When there is no war she creates on. When there is no crisis she creates one. That’s a big part of what happened with her dogs.
Refusal to make decisions, to take care of them so people will be drawn Into her “poor me I can’t take care of my dogs” come do it for me.
I can’t get out to my dogs, but I refuse to throw away the mountains of garbage piled in my yard. When you step in and clean it out it’s “Oh you cleaned it all out”, and then a week later she has thrown garbage all over the place again. Rather than in the dumpster.
Shake it off, let it go and move on. I can do nothing about the attitudes or living situations of people that refuse to help themselves. I can do something about how I live my life.
Yesterday I allowed their attitudes to infect me. I spent most of the day, sad, frustrated, and angry. I truth I went to bed angry last night and woke up angry. My dreams were even angry. I dreamt of this monster storm on the western horizon. I can still see it in my mind’s eye.
Truthfully that storm looked a lot like the emotional turmoil going on inside of me. In the past it has taken me out for days sometimes months at a time. Enough, if they want to live in their self made hell, so be it. I choose to live a different way. Actually live, taste the wonderful fruits of life, take responsibility for my life and the way I live it.
What they do is between them and their God. I give them up to God; they have free will and as a result are responsible for their own lives, and how they live them. Just as I am responsible for my life. Life is a gift; it’s up to you what you do with it.
Enough of this …
Thank you Lord for this Glorious August Day!
Life is a journey, Enjoy the Trip (or not-it’s up to you!)
Mary E. Robbins & the Hairballs
Robbins Run Ranch: Living the Dream With Our Pomeranians
307.788.0202
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