Choice...

Gratitudes:
Ears to hear
Eyes to see
A fire to warm by


Good morning peeps… a bit of rambling… and a bit of prose/poetry… about choice…

The past few days have been good… bad… interesting… all and not…

Yesterday I ran head on into… what shall I call it… geez… it’s a bit like stepping in a runoff of toxic sludge. No not literally a mudslide of toxic sludge… I am talking about an attitude… a way of thinking… truth be told it is the life path this particular person has chosen.

This person has chosen a path of fear… judgment… paranoia… condemnation… and is insistent that all others walking in this life should walk same said path… or be damned. This person is walking along… (figuratively speaking of course) with a fire hose… spraying all those within reach with a coating of toxic waste… the truly frustrating thing… well frustrating for me… is this person is doing this in the name of one so glorious and giving… saying it is this being’s will… judging and condemning all those that do not immediately conform to this person’s dark and dreary way… all the while proclaiming I am a herald… follow me… I am a herald… I command you to follow me… for I am a herald… you must follow me… you are less than… your path is foul… follow me… I know the way… as he trudges along in the toxic waste of his chosen path… in deliberate ignorance…

Refusing to see… refusing to hear… starving when a banquet is set before him… choices…

Yes I would like to reach out and shake this person and say… drop the scales from your eyes and see… or even pry them off said eyes… and expose them to the light… but it is not up to me… to force him to see… blindness or sight… tis his choice…

I would hand him a goblet of water to drink… or perchance a fine wine to quench his thirst… but said is refused and condemned as being less than… as his spirit shrivels and shrinks for want of drink… so I will leave the goblets setting on the banquet table… they are there filled to overflowing if he chooses to drink…

As for me… I am greeting the morning sun… savoring the light of the moon… giving thanks for eyes to see… ears to hear… a mind to think… a spirit to soar… as I meditate and recharge… from being sprayed with his souls sucking toxic waste…

Initially I reacted in hurt then anger… in response to the ignorant judgment and condemnation directed my way. One of so little experience and knowledge to be so hateful and judgmental… but isn’t that usually the way… hateful creatures… spewing judgment… fear… condemnation … and calling it love… calling it God’s love … no less…

Choice is such a tricky thing… that was a be careful what you ask for moment if there ever was one… seeking the gift of choice…

I can choose to stay in hurt and anger and allow that to fester in to judgment and condemnation… or I can step back and see that his words really have nothing to do with me… they are a reflection of his own toxic path… a path he has chosen… yes I would reach out my hand to help him out of the mire… but it is his choice as to whether he will accept it or reject it and allow himself to see…

I can choose to mire myself in his condemnation and pain… or I can choose to forgive… I can choose to love him anyway and step back and allow him to follow his path … yes his words were deliberate and hurtful… but I have choice as well… and I choose to be free… to actually live… and to be free it is necessary for me to forgive… to love … this does not make his words ok… nor does it make me accepting of them… it actually frees me of their toxic grasp…


This bit of poetry… or prose… however you choose to see it… came spilling out of my fingertips this morn…

For those that have ears…
Let them hear…

For those that have eyes…
Let them see…

For those that have life…
Let them live…

I am sorry that you will not see…
But I will not put out my eyes because you have chosen to be blind…

I am sorry that you will not hear…
But I will not destroy my ears because you have chosen to be deaf…

I am sorry you have chosen to make your life barren…
But I will not refuse the gifts because you have chosen to deny…

I am sorry that you have chosen to starve…
But I will not refuse the banquet because you refuse to eat…

Seeing… hearing…living…
Both blessing and curse…

Peaches have pits…
Roses have thorns…

Would you deny the taste of the peach…
To avoid the hardness of the pit…

Would you ignore the beauty of the rose…
To avoid the sharpness of the thorn…

Would you deny the richness of life…
To avoid the depths of despair…

You have choice…
May you use it well…

*******

Oh yes… and before anyone gets up in the air about it… this is not literal… it is not aimed at the physically blind, nor the physically deaf… nor the physically starving… I mean… seriously… get a grip… no there was not a man walking about town with a fire hose spraying toxic sludge… not literally…

May you walk in peace…

Mary E. Robbins
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