Tuesday, July 14, 2009

It's Summer, and I am Alive!

Wow, It’s actually July 14th 2009. How amazing is that. Some will say it’s not amazing at all. Others will nod their heads in agreement, deciding in that moment that it is truly amazing. While they are wondering what is so amazing about it.

We are alive, that is amazing. I am not in a straight jacket; that in itself is truly amazing.

We have a forecast for a week of sunny weather. YaY! I am seriously going to murder flies. Yes tis true; I am a fly murderer. I’m pulling out the grenade and going for the gusto. That stuff is wicked, but it works. Good by to a whole slew of flies, mosquitoes, and grasshoppers. There will still be plenty out and around for the birds to feast on.

When I first moved out here I was afraid to use it. I wanted to increase the bird population on this property. Well I’ve done that, while using the grenade. We are surrounded by farmland, and rangeland. Cattle pasture, beautiful yes. Unfortunately for the cattle they are major fly motels. I’ve seen their backs totally covered by the nasty things. So I will work on a perimeter for our dogs, cats, and household. With fewer flies. Ugh.

I’ve been away from my journals and blogs for a while. It’s taken a bit for me to normalize after the events of this spring. I usually write my way through my life, lol. However this time around. I would sit down to write and this white static would fill my mind, leaving the pages blank. Like a blue screened computer. Overloaded system crash imminent. Need time and space to process, delete garbage files, do a disk scan and defrag. Geez, wish I could do that with my mind.

Actually I do. As we all know, the more complex the computer, as in my mind, the longer it takes to defrag. It’s taken me around 3 months to defrag this one. Defrag, and virus scan. There were some serious Trojans in there this time around. Lol. Think I’ve nuked it with a super virus scan, nope there’s another one. Resulting emotional rollercoaster ride, chaotic to say the least.

I am still here, didn’t have a total data purge either. No termination of program. I am still here firing synapses, functioning on a decent level. Productivity increasing exponentially. Suicidal data dump aborted.

What events have transpired this amazing year? Geez, events, hit overwhelm on that one big time. Yes I will say what has happened, but it will have to wait for the next post.

I must get on with the business at hand. As in taking care of my Pomeranians. Getting rid of flies, grooming, taking puppy pictures, editing web pages and so on. Not to mention rearranging my home to accommodate another human soul living under our roof.

Be well my friends

Life is a journey, enjoy the trip
Mary E. Robbins & the Hairballs
Robbins Run Ranch: Living the Dream With Our Pomeranians
307.788.0202

Friday, May 29, 2009

Weight Loss and Thoughts

Got on the scale this morning. I lost the pound back off that I gained last week. I am at 275lbs now, down from 299 lbs. In actuality I was over 300 lbs in December of 2008. I know I was because I had started to change my eating patterns and working out before I got on the scale for my initial weight.

I frankly, did not want to face that scale going over 300 lbs. So officially, I have lost 24 lbs with 126 lbs to go.

I can really feel the difference in my face. My upper arms have lost fat, whoo hoo. I am looking forward to having the skin draw up to where it needs to be. Right now I have a pair of fat wings on my arms.

There are holes/indentions on my thighs now too. They were solid. I am losing fat out of my thighs, whoo hooo! I am on my way.

On May 22nd, I got some really great news. I received the results from the MRI on my left leg/knee. Happily there were no torn ligaments, tendons or cartilage. My injury was/is a very badly sprained knee joint; and strained muscles up the back of my left calf and thigh. What to do now? Work it baby. Make it bend and just keep at it, even if it feels like it’s the very last thing you’d like to do. Ooooraaaahhhhh… just move it.

Back to the weight loss, or rather fat loss topic. My body seems to drop pounds for several weeks then plateau, for several weeks; then drop again. I am due for another drop.

I don’t think it is just my body. I think I get a bit weirded out over the fat loss/inch loss, even though I definitely want it, and get a bit bingy. It’s amazing just how much of the weight loss issue is actually psychological rather than physical.

This transformation process is truly a total transformation process. physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual. Leave any one out, or try to block the growth/transformation and the entire process falls apart.

It would seem that it is not so much a body transformation, but a life transformation.

Life is a journey, enjoy the trip
Mary E. Robbins & the Hairballs
Robbins Run Ranch: Living the Dream With Our Pomeranians
Independent Beachbody Coach: Specializing in Body/Life Fitness Transformations

Monday, May 25, 2009

For All the Women in Your Life: An Eye Opener on Ovarian Cancer

SIGNS OF OVARIAN CANCER (even in the absence of Ovaries, and no matter what age you are)

THIS IS A MUST TO READ TO THE END

An Eye Opener on Ovarian Cancer

I hope you all take the time to read this and pass it on to all you can. Send this to the women in your life that you care about.

A few years ago, Gilda Radner died of ovarian cancer. Her symptoms were inconclusive, and she was treated for everything under the sun until it was too late. This blood test finally identified her illness but alas, too late. She wrote a book to heighten awareness. Gene Wilder is her widower.

KATHY'S STORY: this is the story of Kathy West

As all of you know, I have Primary Peritoneal Cancer. This cancer has only recently been identified as its OWN type of cancer, but it is essentially Ovarian Cancer.

Both types of cancer are diagnosed in the same way, with the "tumour marker" CA-125 BLOOD TEST, and they are treated in the same way - surgery to remove the primary tumour and then chemotherapy with Taxol and Carboplatin.

Having gone through this ordeal, I want to save others from the same fate.. That is why I am sending this message to you and hope you will print it and give it or send it via E-mail to everybody you know.

One thing I have learned is that each of us must take TOTAL responsibility for our own health care. I thought I had done that because I always had an annual physical and PAP smear, did a monthly Self-Breast Exam, went to the dentist at least twice a year, etc. I even insisted on a sigmoidoscopy and a bone density test last year. When I had a total hysterectomy in 1993, I thought that I did not have to worry about getting any of the female reproductive organ cancers.

LITTLE DID I KNOW. I don't have ovaries (and they were HEALTHY when they were removed), but I have what is essentially ovarian cancer. Strange, isn't it?

These are just SOME of the things our Doctors never tell us: ONE out of every 55 women will get OVARIAN or PRIMARY PERITONEAL CANCER.

The "CLASSIC" symptoms are an ABDOMEN that rather SUDDENLY ENLARGES and CONSTIPATION and/or DIARRHEA.

I had these classic symptoms and went to the doctor. Because these symptoms seemed to be "abdominal", I went to a gastroenterologist. He ran tests that were designed to determine whether there was a bacteria infection; these tests were negative, and I was diagnosed with "Irritable Bowel Syndrome". I guess I would have accepted this diagnosis had it not been for my enlarged abdomen. I swear to you, it looked like I was 4-5 months pregnant! I therefore insisted on more tests.

They took an X-ray of my abdomen; it was negative. I was again assured that I had Irritable Bowel Syndrome and was encouraged to go on my scheduled month-long trip to Europe . I couldn't wear any of my slacks or shorts because I couldn't get them buttoned, and I KNEW something was radically wrong. I INSISTED on more tests, and they reluctantly) scheduled me for a CT-Scan (just to shut me up, I think). This is what I mean by "taking charge of our own health care."

The CT-Scan showed a lot of fluid in my abdomen (NOT normal). Needless to say, I had to cancel my trip and have FIVE POUNDS of fluid drawn off at the hospital (not a pleasant experience I assure you), but NOTHING compared to what was ahead of me.

Tests revealed cancer cells in the fluid. Finally, finally, finally, the doctor ran a CA-125 blood test, and I was properly diagnosed.

I HAD THE CLASSIC SYMPTOMS FOR OVARIAN CANCER, AND YET THIS SIMPLE CA-125 BLOOD TEST HAD NEVER BEEN RUN ON ME, not as part of my annual physical exam and not when I was symptomatic. This is an inexpensive and simple blood test!

PLEASE, PLEASE TELL ALL YOUR FEMALE FRIENDS AND RELATIVES TO INSIST ON A CA-125 BLOOD TEST EVERY YEAR AS PART OF THEIR ANNUAL PHYSICAL EXAMS.

Be forewarned that their doctors might try to talk them out of it, saying, "IT ISN'T NECESSARY." Believe me, had I known then what I know now, we would have caught my cancer much earlier (before it was a stage 3 cancer). Insist on the CA-125 BLOOD TEST; DO NOT take "NO" for an answer!

The normal range for a CA-125 BLOOD TEST is between zero and 35. MINE WAS 754. (That's right, 754!). If the number is slightly above 35, you can have another done in three or six months and keep a close eye on it, just as women do when they have fibroid tumours or when men have a slightly elevated PSA test (Prostatic Specific Antigens) that helps diagnose prostate cancer.

Having the CA-125 test done annually can alert you early, and that's the goal in diagnosing any type of cancer - catching it early..

Do you know 55 women? If so, at least one of them will have this VERY AGGRESSIVE cancer. Please, go to your doctor and insist on a CA-125 test and have one EVERY YEAR for the rest of your life..

And forward this message to every woman you know, and tell all of your female family members and friends. Though the median age for this cancer is 56, (and, guess what, I'm exactly 56), women as young as 22 have it. Age is no factor.

A NOTE FROM AN RN:
Well, after reading this, I made some calls. I found that the CA-125 test is an ovarian screening test equivalent to a man's PSA test prostate screen (which my husband's doctor automatically gives him in his physical each year and insurance pays for it). I called the general practitioner's office about having the test done. The nurse had never heard of it. She told me that she doubted that insurance would pay for it. So I called Prudential Insurance Co, and got the same response. Never heard of it - it won't be covered.

I explained that it was the same as the PSA test they had paid for my husband for years. After conferring with whomever they confer with, she told me that the CA-125 would be covered.

It is $75 in a GP's office and $125 at the GYN's. This is a screening test that should be required just like a PAP smear (a PAP smear cannot detect problems with your ovaries). And you must insist that your insurance company pay for it.

Gene Wilder and Pierce Brosnan (his wife had it, too) are lobbying for women's health issues, saying that this test should be required in our physicals, just like the PAP and the mammogram. PLEASE TAKE A MOMENT TO SEND THIS OUT TO ALL THOSE YOU CAN. BE IT MALE OR FEMALE, IT SHOULD NOT MATTER, AS THEY CAN FORWARD IT ALSO TO THOSE LOVED ONES THEY KNOW.

*****
This came into my email today. Had to share it!

Life is a journey, one day one step at a time
Mary E. Robbins
Robbins Run Ranch: Living the Dream With Our Pomeranians
Independent Beachbody Coach: Helping Other's Reach Their Fitness and Financial Goals

307.788.0202

Monday, May 18, 2009

Mists of Lore & News of the Past 2 Months

Listen all to the tales of yore
Lived we have in the mists of lore

Shadowy forms just out of sight
Fighting doubt in the misty light

Silvery wings, dragon’s breath
Lute’s that sing, tales of death

Unicorns, Centaurs, Cerberus too
Dancing under the aged Yew

Circles round and round did flow
What say you, to Stonehenge go

What truths are hidden in the fairy’s tale
What tales do the banshees’ of the highlands wail

Hear ye now and doubt no more
Lived we have in the mists of lore

author: Mary E. Robbins

A friend on facebook posted about fairies, gnomes, lore as a result this came pouring out of my soul.



I apologize for being absent, I haven’t been posting much on my blogs since March 25th. It has been a challenging couple of months. On March 25th, I damaged my left knee. I am still not walking well. However with some effort I can get up off the loveseat.

Last Friday I had an MRI on my knee. This coming Friday I should get the results. Then hopefully get some input on rehabbing my knee.

Frankly It amazes me that I damaged it at all. Considering my lifestyle of the past. I’ve ridden broncs, back packed for miles and miles over rough terrain, ran over rough terrain, wiped out on bicycles while clipped in, and so on and so on. March 25th, I hyperextended my left knee falling off a 6 ft snowdrift. How pathetic is that.

Of course when I was doing all those other activities I wasn’t 150 pounds overweight. As in fat fat fat. Both the doc and my chiropractor think I’ve torn my ACL and Meniscus. The MRI should tell the story for sure. I am hoping upon hope that I do not have to have surgery, but I will do whatever I have to do to rehab my knee.

I started doing hip hop abs again the day before yesterday. I put my hinged brace on and made the knee work. It’s bending better as a result. The rest of the day was spent icing then moving, icing then moving. Trying to quiet the screaming muscles in the back of my leg.

We had the late march blizzard, that resulted in my jacked up leg, and pulling all the Poms into the whelping house for weeks. There were some seriously pissed off hairballs. They wanted out to run and play in the snow and mess. Unfortunately the outside runs were buried under 6 ft of snow. Drifted over the tops of the surround fence, making it very unsafe for the poms to be out and about. The predators could walk in and snatch them up, so they had very short outside jaunts in the one little area we were able to clear out to some extent.

Then here came another blizzard in the first part of April. Good grief! On the bright side the grass is growing like crazy now.
The hairballs are able to be outside playing in their runs again. Happy hairballs one and all, lol.

They were still inside for the most part on April 14th. There had been so much moisture that we needed to wait until the ground dried out to some extent. The evening of April 14th, I had just sat down to watch the Biggest Loser; when I received a screaming phone call from my mom’s neighbor to the west. I’ll never forget that phone call. She said, “Your mom’s house is on fire, you need to get over here” that’s all I heard.

I live 13 to 17 miles from my mom’s house depending on whether you take all dirt roads or go on the highway part way. I called 911 and reported the fire, Decided to take my mom’s minivan over there (we kept it here for her) just in case they had gotten her out. I remember trying to stay calm driving, so I wouldn’t wreck the minivan. David was gone on the train, so I was dealing with it alone. I was taking deep breaths gulping back fear and tears, seeing my mom’s little dog in my mind’s eye. Wondering if my mom was burned alive or if she had gotten out alive.

As it turns out our family home of over 100 years is burned to ashes and rubble; Utter devastation. The neighbor to the east had broken down the door, and the neighbor to the west went in with him and they got mom out in a broken power wheelchair. Her 8 Poms, and her birds died in the fire. From what I understand the flame jumped over the door when they took mom out and no-one was able to go back in to get the dogs out. Guess that’s why I kept seeing her face on the drive over.

Mom was in shock for over a week. The experience shocked her so much that she is still unable to transfer from one chair to another on her own. She is living with us now. She is doing much better than she was. On a bright note we have actually been able to spend some quality time together. Perhaps get to know each other as people.

We are reconfiguring our home, sorting out a room for mom. Integrating her into our home.

I had started a 90 day action plan. I am still working on it. Although it looks significantly different than what was originally intended. My workouts had to change. I have been doing my ranch rounds as workouts. Frankly when I had everyone crated for most of the day it was taking all I had just to take care of them. I was working on the crates for around 4 hours a day non stop. With the leg injury that was knocking me out. I did continue to drop weight. I have lost 24 pounds and 18 inches so far. Whoo Hoo! 126 pound to go for the 150 pound weight loss goal.




Today is day 71 in my 90 day action plan.

One day one step, one pound at a time. We have had some major challenges over the past 2 months. It would be very easy to be bitter and defeated. It is a conscious decision to view these events as challenges, and move on. What positive things have come out of these experiences?

I’ve lost more fat. I spent some quality time with my Poms. We have a new litter of puppies. Snickers and Barron had puppies today. The little cuties. I’ll do photos over the next few days.

Trimmed toenails, and worked on grooming as I was working with the hairballs. Will be working on spring grooming daily.

Mom and I now have a chance to actually spend some quality time together. The past several years have been strained. I’d been worried about her living there alone; and she was adamant that she was unwilling to even consider spending time elsewhere. I know that she is getting good nutrition. She has started doing the Tony and the Folks workout. Modified of course, but she is trying. She worked out in her lift chair today with some exercise bands. These are good things.

The fire purged our family home. But we have come through the fire and are growing like new growth after a forest fire.

Life is a journey, sometimes there are twists in the trail.
Mary E. Robbins & the Hairballs
Robbins Run Ranch: Living the Dream With Our Pomeranians

Independent Beachbody Coach: Changing People's Lives
307.788.0202

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